By Kate Conway

As today's edition of The Rush Limbaugh Show got going, Rush's listeners were left to wonder if his promised analysis of President Obama's health care speech yesterday would be as exciting as Rush suggested.

Sure enough, after two brief digressions -- a mention of the RNC's fundraising campaign that plans to capitalize on donors' fears of the president and of socialism and a story about extra-small condoms targeted at 12-year-olds going on sale in Switzerland -- Rush dived right into health care.

Rush played a clip of Rep. Bart Stupak (D-MI) saying that if the Senate bill is presented to the House, House members won't vote for it. He then suggested that in order to win Stupak's vote, they limit the number of abortions in the bill, exempt Michigan (Stupak's home state) from abortion funding, tax abortions 0.01 percent, and rename the bill after Stupak. Rush chuckled to himself after saying that this is how Obama operates.

Rush insisted that talk of reconciliation is a “feint,” insisting that if the House passes the Senate bill, it will go immediately to Obama's desk for a signature. He seemed hopeful, however, that the House will not having enough votes.

Recalling Obama's health care speech yesterday, which was attended by several doctors in lab coats, Rush launched into a rant about the Obama administration's mistreatment of doctors. Rush suggested that any doctor who supports Obama might be in line for a lobotomy, and then paused to ask if he is still allowed to use the word “lobotomy” in satire, since he is no longer allowed to use the "R-word." He then said:

LIMBAUGH: Has there ever been a more respected profession this maligned, this used, and this minimized? Obama uses doctors like Tiger Woods uses pancake house waitresses and pole dancers.

Rush concluded his rant by declaring that Obama is on a “rampage” to pass a “monument” to himself.

In the next segment, Rush revisited the RNC's fundraising campaign:

LIMBAUGH: You know, I'm watching MSNBC, they're just going nuts over this RNC fundraising thing. It's so bad, are they playing on fear? Are they playing on fear? What, pray tell, is the entire strategy used by liberals and Democrats my whole life? Global warming -- fear. You're going to die if you eat or drink that -- fear. We ought to be afraid of these Democrats. It's natural to be afraid of Obama. He is a Joker.

Rush then asked if such a fundraising strategy can really be described as “disdainful” since the RNC is inviting donors to a fancy party.

After asking where Obama's laser-like focus on jobs has been, Rush read from a Roll Call article that quotes House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer (D-MD) on the process of reconciliation. The article states that while many have been assuming that fixes to the health care bill would be passed via reconciliation after the House passed the Senate version of the bill, Hoyer has said that the House could pass a reconciliation bill amending the Senate bill prior to adopting the Senate bill. Rush surmised that passing fixes prior to passing the bill itself was “probably illegal” and then grumbled that Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-NV) would sign off on it anyway.

Rush then read from a post on the Heritage Foundation's blog, highlighting a section about House members -- including Stupak -- who previously voted for health care reform but have said that they may switch their votes to no. Rush also noted the following excerpt from the post:

Sen. Dick Durbin (D-IL) tells Politico that Senate Democrats are planning a gesture some time next week that will guarantee to House Democrats the Senate will act: “I don't know what the gesture will be but it will be a convincing gesture.”

Echoing the article, he then insisted that what we have here is “Kabuki theater” before playing a series of clips from his own show yesterday and dubbing them “I-told-you-sos.”

Rush finished up the hour with an attempt to convince Democrats that Obama is not trustworthy. He insisted that none of the changes that Obama “lied about” in his health care speech yesterday are in a bill because there is no Obama bill; the only bill that exists is the Senate bill passed on Christmas Eve. Rush then provided his listeners with a laundry list of right-wing talking points, mentioning, among other things, Obama's failure to close the detention facility at Guantánamo Bay, his failure to repeal Don't Ask, Don't Tell, Creigh Deeds' loss to Bob McDonnell in the Virginia governor's race, losing the Ted Kennedy's seat in Massachusetts, losing the bid for the Olympics, losing on the “stupid” climate bill in Copenhagen, Van Jones, the New Black Panthers, the teleprompter, and bashing a decorated Cambridge police officer for doing his job and being right. To conclude, Rush called Obamacare the “biggest nuke” of all and told Democrats that it would end their careers.

Limbaugh compares the health care bill to the birth and resurrection of Jesus Christ

Rush opened the second hour of his show with a little ego massage, talking about the opinion-auditing service that evaluates the validity of his opinions. Referring to his previous assertion that the Republicans should not attend the health care summit, he states that his opinion auditing agency is now withholding their February audit because the final verdict on the wisdom of the Republicans' attendance is still up in the air.

Returning to reality, Rush read from an article about Los Angeles school teachers being removed from their classrooms for giving students pictures of O.J. Simpson, RuPaul, and Dennis Rodman to carry in a Black History Month parade. He then quoted Shakespeare to say that “brevity is the soul of wit.”

Rush spent a few moments complaining about the media, singling out Savannah Guthrie for referring to Obama as someone who prides himself on being a consensus-builder. Briefly switching tacks, Rush happily played a montage of media figures claiming that Obama was “flip-flopping” on reconciliation, and then soured and complained that the media were reporting Obama's 2007 criticism of reconciliation without directly condemning it.

Rush resumed his discussion of health care reform with a shout-out to Stupak, asking him how it feels to be treated like a Republican by the media. Apparently determined to spend his entire show talking about health care reform but lacking anything of substance to say about it, Rush then offered us an alternative analysis of the process of passing the bill:

LIMBAUGH: So he wants -- he wants Obamacare passed on Easter. Do you realize this guy ruined our summer? This guy ruined our Thanksgiving. This guy ruined our Christmas, and now he's going to ruin our Easter by trying to ramrod something nobody wants down their throats, and on Easter. As something very symbolic, I'm going to get that.

Obamacare was born on Christmas Eve, and now they want to resurrect it on Easter. Some might say that the bill was conceived on Christmas Eve, but the template will fit a messiah if it passes. How better to portray yourself as a real messiah if your signature issue is born, or conceived -- whatever -- on Christmas Eve and dies and then is resurrected on Easter?

The only problem -- well, I know it's not a virgin birth, since we're all getting the shaft here and getting screwed, but it's also going to be a problem with his Muslim friends, with the timing here. Could've done it on Ramadan and been a little bit better for them, but never mind that.

Rush then brought up the debate over abortion funding in the health care bill, asserting that it was “iron[ic]” that health care reform hinges on deciding before Easter whether or not the U.S. “will pay for the killing of babies.”

At this point, a cardiologist called in to talk about the difficulty her practice is having because of Medicare pay cuts. Rush complained that cardiologists' payments are set by bureaucrats in offices rather than by the cardiologists themselves according to patients' needs or ability to pay. Rush declared that this is price-fixing, and then compared it to an expensive hotel being forced to give a room to someone who can't pay the full room fee.

Responding to more calls on health care reform, Rush ranted that Obama doesn't care what the people think and that most of the Democrats in Washington don't either. They don't think you're smart. They don't think believe that health care reform is good for you, but they know it's good for them.

After another call, Rush declared that it's no accident that Obama wore a purple tie during his speech, since that's the color of the SEIU. Union types that exist in the federal government, he said, are essentially communists. Continuing to riff on unions, Rush then told us that SEIU president Andy Stern wants to unionize doctors and that Stern is Obama's blood brother.

In one last call before the end of the hour, a caller told Rush that part of Obama's plan will be to decrease care for older Americans so that they will die and lighten the load on the system. Rush declared that the caller was brilliant and said that she was exactly right -- the whole purpose of health care reform is to orchestrate people's lives.

Limbaugh: “Is Obama delusional? Is he really crazy? ... Or is he just this narcissistic and dishonest?”

As we dived into Hour Three, it became readily apparent that rest of Rush's show would be spent harping on health care reform as well. To start, Rush read from a Wall Street Journal opinion piece talking about Rep. Paul Ryan's (R-WI) remarks to President Obama at the health care summit. In response to the article, Rush stated:

LIMBAUGH: The question here that needs to be addressed: Is Obama delusional? Is he really crazy? Is he this detached from reality? Or is he just this narcissistic and dishonest?

Rush then played several clips of Ryan speaking at the health care summit, repeatedly saying that it's very significant that no one has tried to refute Ryan's remarks.

Next, Rush repeated his tired claim that health care reform is about crashing the system, and took a page from Beck's book by referring to Cloward-Piven. He declared that we've never had people so radical in positions of such power. While he conceded that some Democrats are probably convinced it's about compassion, he insisted that that's not what the leadership thinks.

For most of the rest of the show, Rush took calls, few of them noteworthy.

One caller wanted to tie the current discussion of reconciliation to South African politics after apartheid, saying that in order for reconciliation between the races to occur, communication had to be based on truth. Rush seemed a little confused and said that he was pretty sure that South Africans weren't talking about budget reconciliation.

On a break between calls, Rush returned to his earlier point about collapsing the system, stating that one of the core principles of Marxism is that the capitalist system must fully collapse before Marxism can be installed. There can be no integration. He declared that this is why Trotskyites supported Hitler in Germany.

To close out the show, Rush took a few more calls. In response to a caller who was angry about single-issue voters and who complained about those who vote based on a pro-life stance, Rush declared:

LIMBAUGH: I understand what irritates you about people like that, is you think they're single-issue, and if that issue isn't right, then they'll vote for the ruination of the country in other ways just to stand on their belief on it. But I'm telling you they aren't the problem. The problem -- B-A-R-A-C-K O-B-A-M-A. Barack Hussein Obama. Eric Holder. Nancy Pelosi. Harry Reid. Tom Harkin. Anybody with a capital D by their name is the problem, not the Christians.

Michael Timberlake contributed to this edition of the Limbaugh Wire.