Who's out to get Glenn Beck?

These are tough days for Glenn Beck, beset as he is on all sides by the growing, chaotic conspiracy that will eventually take him down. Seeing as he's supposedly the last man standing in this final, apocalyptic fight to save America as we know it (brought to you by Goldline), when he falls, the country goes with him.

And in case you doubt the seriousness of the threat, let's take a look at who is out to get Glenn Beck:

The White House

President Obama

Other people in the Oval Office

The FCC

The IMF

The IRS

The press

Progressives

Nazis

Media Matters' "unholy alliance"

Jim Wallis

Pastors in general

MoveOn.org and the SEIU

SEIU president Andy Stern

Rep. Anthony Weiner (D-NY)

The rest of Congress

Census workers

Government assassins

George Soros

Alinsky-ites

Rock throwers

The fake CIA

Cannibals

Hobbits

Satanists

Spanish teachers

All teachers

Redcoats

Murderers and rapists

Keyser Soze

Tonya Harding

And, of course, "they" - it's always "they"...