TUCKER CARLSON (HOST): He has resurfaced. He showed up in Washington, D.C. the other day, looking like a guy who lives in the men's room at your public library, eating imaginary insects out of the air. And he was there to get, for some reason, into a shouting match with the senior editor of Human Events called Jack Posobiec. It was all on tape. You should watch this. What's really the most interesting part of it is not the policy debate, but Jon Stewart himself, he's totally unrecognizable. He looks demented.
That's Jon Stewart? The famous Jon Stewart? He looks like a homeless mental patient. He's shrieking and disheveled and very short. Really short. Too short to date. Was he always that short? What happened? Where's he been the last seven years? If you know, let us know. We want answers.