By Greg Lewis

Kicking off “Open Line Friday,” Rush was absolutely beside himself with joy over the just-breaking news that Chicago lost their bid for the 2016 Summer Olympics. Rejoicing at what he considered to be a rejection of Obama, Rush called it the worst day of the Obama presidency, and was probably a result of Obama apologizing for his country and telling everybody how much our country sucks for the past nine months. Why would anybody award the Olympics to such a crappy place? asked Rush.

Rush continued to muse that the world wanted Obama to fail, and asked if “emperor of the world” Obama was a “blithering moron” to fly to Copenhagen to get turned down. Rush called Obama's lobbying foolish. Rush also wondered if Obama realized that the people in Europe hate America, and asked how much money was wasted trying to bribe the International Olympic Committee's members.

Then Rush read from a CNN article posted before the votes were cast about Michelle Obama “steal[ing] the show” in Copenhagen. Next, Rush aired an audio clip of NBC's Chuck Todd talking about the repercussions of the vote, commenting that from now on, Obama's Chicago friends trying to call in a favor will go to the back of the line. Rush again asserted that Obama and the First Lady didn't want to go, but were compelled by Mayor Daley, Valerie Jarrett, and other “corrupt Chicagoans.”

Rush went on to predict that the media would blame him for spreading his “I want Obama to fail” vibe around the world. After the break, Rush talked about Obama's hatred of competition, and how the media might also frame the story as Americans letting Obama down, and not doing enough to support Obama. Rush sarcastically apologized in this regard.

Rush said that Obama was trying to make Chicago a bright, shining cesspool, and now he is going to use these “well-honed skills” of persuasion to get the Iranians to stop their nuclear program. Rush predicted tomorrows headlines would mention him:

LIMBAUGH: Look for the headline later today: “Republicans joyful American loses Olympics. Limbaugh ecstatic Obama loses, embarrassed in Denmark.”

After some audio clips of Obama's “begging” at the IOC, Rush took another break , then returned with more comments on the Olympics. After claiming that Valerie Jarrett owns property -- “slums” as Rush described -- Limbaugh said that she would have profited from the Olympics if they had come to Chicago (she doesn't and she wouldn't have).

Rush then aired some audio clips of Michelle Obama “begging” at the IOC -- he mocked the First Lady for talking about her father. Rush said that the speech resulted in the IOC “puking.” Anyway, Rush said this was “weakness on display” reminiscent of Michael Dukakis and Jimmy Carter. Rush claimed Obama would never live this down, just as Dukakis never lived down his “Beetle Bailey moment.” Rush warned that “weakness invites trouble” and said that our enemies are “secretly rubbing their hands in glee” over this.

Then Rush asked a question “seriously”: “Are we actually being governed by an imbecile?” Rush said that the IOC and “the world” ran rings around Obama -- “this was a bitch-slap, folks. Upside the head.” Rush continued to criticize Obama for going to Copenhagen when the Olympics weren't a done deal.

Rush on Olympic vote: “Obama cannot win in a fair vote. The only thing missing in that vote today was ACORN [...] stuffing ballot boxes, registering fake IOC members”

Closing out the hour, Rush posited whether Chicago was rejected because Obama didn't bring ACORN to stuff the ballot boxes:

LIMBAUGH: You know, like I always say, folks -- and I've been saying it since the primaries -- Obama cannot win in a fair vote. The only thing missing in that vote over there today was ACORN. If he had had ACORN representation stuffing ballot boxes, registering fake IOC members, then maybe Chicago would have had a chance. But Obama couldn't do that; he couldn't get ACORN over there. See, Obama doesn't debate people, he clears the field, and he couldn't clear the field today.

Rush added that Oprah was so distraught, “she ate Norway,” and Michelle Obama ordered Air Force One to Paris for a week of shopping. Then Rush reacted to the breaking news that Rio de Janeiro won the 2016 Olympic bid, commenting on the notorious “crime and thuggery” in the city, and its apparent lack of hotels. Then Rush played a “funny” and “pleasurable” clip of CNN's Tony Harris reacting live to Chicago's elimination after the first round of voting “in a state of disbelief.”

Rush: “Anything that gets in the way of Barack Obama accomplishing his domestic agenda is fine with me”

Rush began the second hour by referring to a Politico article on John McCain's attempt to remake the GOP, which Rush sounded unhappy about. Rush warned this would accelerate a third party movement. Next, Rush read a few headlines declaring Obama's “failure” in lobbying for the Chicago Olympics.

Then, defending his irrational blanket rejection of everything Obama does, Rush said:

LIMBAUGH: For those of you on the other side of the aisle listening in who are upset that I sound gleeful, I am. I don't deny it. I'm happy. Anything that gets in the way of Barack Obama accomplishing his domestic agenda is fine with me.

He explained:

LIMBAUGH: don't want Obamacare to succeed. I want national health care, socialized medicine, to fail. I want cap-and-trade -- a national carbon tax emissions policy based on a hoax -- I want that to fail. I do not want the government owning car companies, I don't want the government running banks, I don't want the government in charge of loans, I don't want any of it. I want all of that to fail. And for those things to fail, I'm sorry to say, our president must fail, because they're his ideas. It is the ideas I want to fail, but the architect of those ideas must, by the same sense of logic, must fail at the same time the ideas do. So anything that weakens and helps people to see the real Obama, it's a step forward.

Then Rush moved on to quickly comment on the story that David Letterman had sex with some of his female employees and was later the target of an extortion plot. Rush declared that he had never had sex with anyone on his staff because, unlike Letterman, Rush had “standards of decency.”

After the break, Rush blamed the Obamas for politicizing the Olympics, and said that the IOC “bitch-slapped” them for trying to hijack the show. Then Rush took a caller who was “extremely happen” over the Olympics rejection, while the next caller tried to explain to Rush how the failed Saturn-Penske deal was the first visible link to Obama's failed policies. Rush went on to rant about the chip on Obama's shoulder and Obama's purposeful destruction of the private sector.

Rush came back from the next commercial break with more of the same rambling about Chicago's Olympic rejection. Rush figured that the media would now start making excuses for Obama. Moments later, he had his first piece of evidence for his theory -- a New York Times article reporting on Obama's meeting with Gen. Stanley McChrystal in Copenhagen after his speech to the IOC. Rush predicted the narrative would form that it Obama's trip was all a “clever ruse” for his “secret” meeting with McChrystal.

Then Rush read a post from the Times' Dot Earth blog asking if Obama would go back to Copenhagen for the global climate treaty talks in December. Next, Rush took a caller who wanted to “change the subject” and talk about the role of women:

CALLER: I think that women were designed and created to nurture babies, to love them, to educate them, to teach them to achieve their full academic potential. To love their fellow man. To become entrepreneurs. And I think they are stepping outside of the by pursuing a role and stuff that just leaves them empty.

LIMBAUGH: I have a hard time disagreeing with this. Look at Hillary Clinton.

This third and final hour got going with more of the same Olympics gloating by Rush. At one point Rush claimed Obama advisor Valerie Jarrett owns “slums” and would have benefitted from the Olympics, calling Chicago a city of corruption.

Then Rush talked more about John McCain's attempts to remake the GOP, and former McCain campaign manager Steve Schmidt saying that a Palin run for president in 2012 could be a catastrophe for the party. Rush read his response to a “state-controlled media” reporter who asked for his comment on this. The gist of the response was a call for the “McCain crowd” to acknowledge they're losers and move aside for the next, more competent, generation of Republicans to take over.

After a commercial break, Rush had an idea. With Letterman being applauded for his affairs, and Roman Polanski being defended for “not rape-rape,” now would be the perfect time for every Republican to admit any affairs they've had, date rape, or other skeletons in their closets. Rush mused that Mark Foley could have just waited for now for his scandal to come out.

Next, Rush read a Newsweek blog post arguing that losing the Olympics could be good for Obama. Rush read this at length and took credit for predicting the narrative of the media spinning this for Obama. The next caller asked why it would be impossible to roll back health care reform if it passed. Rush explained it's because it's very hard to roll back any social program with “tentacles” deep in the fabric of society, which is why reform has to be stopped.

After another break, Rush pointed to a CNS News article about Sen. Thomas Carper (D-DE) saying that, as a member of the Senate Finance Committee, he does not “expect” to read the legislative language of the committee's health care bill because it's “confusing.” Rush feigned as much outrage as he could over a trivial matter like this, but he missed the point. As blogger Ezra Klein wrote, the Finance Committee is different than other committees because they write and debate their legislation in “plain English” so that senators can better grasp what they're debating. This so-called conceptual language is later converted into legalese. Klein explained:

People like to demand that congressmen should read the full text of bills. But congressmen don't do that because it's an absurd request: The bills are incomprehensible. It wouldn't enhance their understanding at all. Conceptual language, however, does, and if it became standard practice for bills to begin in that format, I imagine many more members would read them.

The final caller asked Rush why he wasn't on Twitter. Rush explained that he has never been a “joiner” or a sheep. He also made reference to all the Fake Limbaughs out there on Twitter.

Zachary Aronow and Zachary Pleat contributed to this edition of the Limbaugh Wire.

Highlights

Outrageous comments

LIMBAUGH: You know, like I always say, folks -- and I've been saying it since the primaries -- Obama cannot win in a fair vote. The only thing missing in that vote over there today was ACORN. If he had had ACORN representation stuffing ballot boxes, registering fake IOC members, then maybe Chicago would have had a chance. But Obama couldn't do that; he couldn't get ACORN over there. See, Obama doesn't debate people, he clears the field, and he couldn't clear the field today.

[...]

LIMBAUGH: For those of you on the other side of the aisle listening in who are upset that I sound gleeful, I am. I don't deny it. I'm happy. Anything that gets in the way of Barack Obama accomplishing his domestic agenda is fine with me. I stand by -- I don't want Obamacare to succeed. I want national health care, socialized medicine, to fail. I want cap-and-trade -- a national carbon tax emissions policy based on a hoax -- I want that to fail. I do not want the government owning car companies, I don't want the government running banks, I don't want the government in charge of loans, I don't want any of it. I want all of that to fail. And for those things to fail, I'm sorry to say, our president must fail, because they're his ideas. It is the ideas I want to fail, but the architect of those ideas must, by the same sense of logic, must fail at the same time the ideas do. So anything that weakens and helps people to see the real Obama, it's a step forward. Gotta say it.

[...]

CALLER: I think that women were designed and created to nurture babies, to love them, to educate them, to teach them to achieve their full academic potential. To love their fellow man. To become entrepreneurs. And I think they are stepping outside of the by pursuing a role and stuff that just leaves them empty.

LIMBAUGH: I have a hard time disagreeing with this. Look at Hillary Clinton.

Ego on loan from Narcissus

LIMBAUGH: Look for the headline later today: “Republicans joyful American loses Olympics. Limbaugh ecstatic Obama loses, embarrassed in Denmark.”